I've been meaning to write my thoughts down but haven't had much down time the past week or so I've officially moved out of Seoul and checked into a hotel here. My mother and I are staying at a very nice hotel in Bundang for a few more days before I finally (lastly) move into my apartment. The entire apartment (insert very loud, forced laughter here) including washing machine, closet and the bathroom, is about the size of if not a little smaller than my last dorm room in college. I walked in and all four walls felt like I could reach them with my hands. And it was at that moment that I heard the walls of the universe crumbling in around me and a loud, booming voice exclaim, "THIS IS YOUR VERY OWN HOLE IN THE WALL."

I'd continue grumbling about it but I'm forcing myself to still rejoice and give thanks in this difficult season of transition. There are things that God is moving me through right now that is teaching me to walk with Him, so I'm grateful. At Jubilee today I was reminded of God as our Jehovah Jireh, provider of the miraculous manna, and our ultimate responsibility as people of God. As hard as it feels like it's been, adjusting to life in Korea and starting my job at Leadersville, I'm forcing myself not to grumble and complain the way the Israelites did. For me, those Exodus stories reveal the sweetness of God's heart; God is so faithful and patient in pursuing the Israelites even through their idolatry, grumbling and rebellion. I know that my own lack of thanksgiving and rejoicing has been a similar rebellious sense of attitude.

Give thanks in all circumstances:
1) I'm thankful for a job, for all the people who believed I could do this job and who offered me a chance to be a teacher here.
2) I'm thankful for my mom and dad, who always try to support me even if they suffocate me in the process.
3) I'm thankful for today's message because it allowed me to see how ungrateful I am. I know that God was rebuking me, disciplining me this morning. I could feel him pressing me to repent, to stop whining and learn how to live a life of rejoicing in the Lord: phillipians 4 always.